Vagina Plans

Vagina Plans

Whether you know it or not, YOU are on a “Vagina Plan” with someone… Here are 20 common plans that you may be on right now. If you don’t like the “plan” that you are on, then you can upgrade, downgrade or cancel your contract.

“Data Only” Plan – Media Sex … Skype sex, nasty texts, naked pics, nude videos but no sex… You two are “sexters”. COST: The price of your own phone bill.

“Evening and Weekend” Plan – After the club sex about 1 or 2 times a month. COST: Condom, Cab Fare or Ride to work in the morning. 

“Sugar Daddy” Plan – Sex whenever she gets scared that you’re going to cut her off for holding out. Must be 45+ yrs old. COST: Most of her bills, tuition, leisure activities. 

“Hush” Plan – Man has a girlfriend, baby mama, or wife. You two have sex on a regular basis. COST: Whatever she asks for so she can STFU to his main woman. 

“Broke Dick Vacation” Plan – Man doesn’t have any money to share with you or support you but has EXCELLENT sex. COST: Free for 30 days, then get rid of him. 

“Maintenance Man” Plan – The girl is in a relationship but calls “him” to get “fixed” (dick). COST: She is tricking on “him”.

“Bastard” Plan You are with a man who is a dog but you “LOVE” him. COST: Heartache, Tears, No friends, no family, 

“Baby Daddy” Plan – Still fucking her baby daddy in hopes of becoming a family one day or again. COST: No child support/take care of her bills n child alone. 

“Off Limits” Plan – Nobody is supposed to know yall are fucking and if you tell, they’ll deny it. COST: An ASS whopping, JOB loss, gas to go to further places and/or hotel fees. 

“Oral” Plan – Never have sex, just give head. COST: Herpes. 

“Pay Pal” Plan – A FRIEND that you don’t have sex with.  You are taking their kindness for weakness because they offer you money or to pay for stuff for you. (BECAUSE they LIKE you) COST: Burnt Bridge.

“Sweet n Low Daddy” Plan – Not together at all. Don’t have constant contact. Y’all get together for date and/or sex. COST: Free entertainment for you and sometimes friends. And occasional financial help here or there. 

“Passport Cutty” Plan – Flies you out to hang out and fuck. COST: Flight, hotel, all expense paid stay including entertainment, shopping, food and cash to go back home with.

“Full House” Plan – He got kids, You got kids…Y’all live together. You’re happy to have a man/family. COST: Your Sanity.

“3some” Plan – You get called to be the 3rd party. COST: Prices may vary depending on your pussy.

“Cinderella” Plan – He is your prince charming and you think you are HAPPY. COST: Waking up and it all being a dream! Lol.

“No baggage” Plan – You and him were single with no kids and now you are in a healthy relationship together. COST: Brushing off the haters. 

“Check” Plan – He pays you to fuck. COST: Depends on your rate. 

“Throwback” Plan – Fucking your ex. COST: Being in Limbo. 

“Illusionist” Plan – Things are going GREAT. You are in “LIKE, LUST and “LOVE” for anywhere between 1 week and 3 months and then POOF, he falls back or disappears. COST: Suicide.

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